Take a moment to check in with yourself. Are you carrying unspoken stress, anger, or sadness? Do you ever feel it in your chest, neck, or stomach but brush it off because life is too busy, and you think you’ll deal with it later?
Here’s the hard truth: Later might be too late.
Six months ago, I came across Gabor Maté’s groundbreaking book, When the Body Says No, and it changed how I view health, emotions, and the invisible threads that connect them.
It’s one of the most powerful wake-up calls I’ve ever had.
In the book, Maté draws from scientific research and real-life stories to reveal a shocking reality: our emotions don’t just “go away” when we suppress them—they stay in our bodies, increasing the risk of serious illnesses like cancer, autoimmune diseases, and chronic conditions.
Let me share a few insights that hit me the hardest:
1. The Link Between Suppressed Emotions and Illness
Maté writes about individuals who spent years burying their feelings—anger, grief, fear—and later developed life-threatening illnesses. One woman he describes had breast cancer, and it was no coincidence that she’d spent decades prioritizing others’ needs, bottling up her anger, and never speaking her truth.
This resonated with me deeply because, in the last six months alone, three women I know personally—young mothers between 35 and 45—were diagnosed with Stage 3 breast cancer.
They were seemingly healthy. They were doing all the right things—exercising, eating well, and balancing work and family. But beneath the surface? Years of unacknowledged stress, emotional pain, and the invisible weight of holding everything together.
2. Work Stress Is Tough, but Family Stress Cuts Deeper
We often talk about work-related stress—and it’s real.
But what we rarely address is the deeper, more personal stress that comes from dysfunctional relationships, family dynamics, or unspoken conflicts.
This stress is harder to share because it feels private, vulnerable. Yet it’s precisely these unresolved emotions—anger, sadness, guilt—that seep into our bodies, quietly wreaking havoc.
Maté explains that while genetics can play a role in illness, it’s the emotional triggers and chronic stress that activate those genes.
For example, he describes how suppressed trauma and unprocessed pain can “switch on” autoimmune diseases or cancer in people predisposed to them.
3. Recovery Starts With Naming the Pain
The most hopeful part of Maté’s work? Recovery is possible when people confront their unspoken emotions. He shares stories of individuals who began talking about the true sources of their stress—family dynamics, childhood trauma, grief—and experienced profound healing.
These stories are not about miracles but about the mind-body connection’s real power.
When we release what’s been stored in our bodies, we create space for healing.
This Is Personal
Reading this book made me stop and reflect on my own life. How often have I ignored stress, put on a brave face, and pushed forward because “that’s just life”? And at what cost?
It also made me think about the people I love. I can’t unsee the connection between emotions and illness, and it’s terrifying to realize how common it is for us to keep silent about our inner struggles—until our bodies force us to listen.
What You Don’t Say, Stays in Your Body
If there’s one takeaway from this post, let it be this: Everything you don’t express, your body holds onto.
Unspoken anger? Stored.
Deep sadness? Stored.
Chronic stress? Stored.
But it doesn’t stay quiet forever.
This post isn’t about scaring you—it’s about waking you up.
If you’re carrying emotions you’ve been ignoring, it’s time to acknowledge them.
Talk to someone. Journal. Scream into a pillow. Cry if you need to.
Just don’t let it stay inside.
Because your health, your future, and the people who love you depend on it.
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